The Ugly Duckling Theory


As kids growing up, I think we all heard the story of the ugly duckling. Nine ducklings were born, with eight of them being beautiful, fluffy, and yellow. The last one was born white and without much fluff, so all the other ducklings made fun of the one ugly duckling. The ugly duckling felt left out, ostracized, and ended up trying to find ways to fit in with his brothers and sisters. As time went on, the ugly duckling almost gave up hope. One day, while looking at his reflection in the water and he noticed that he was not a fluffy yellow duck, but a beautiful white swan. He went and found the other swans, and they flew away together and lived happily ever after.

Similar to that ugly duckling, if you aren’t a natural networker and feel like you don’t belong, you can still become one.  In fact, you can become one of the best.  The fact that you don’t feel like a networker can help you to understand the average person’s fear more than someone who has always been fearless and charismatic.  There are obvious strengths and weaknesses to every skill that we have, but a lot of that comes from your perspective.  You will be able to relate better based on your experience.  You can turn your weaknesses into strengths.  You can always use your so called “weaknesses” as an advantage. It all depends on your perspective and what you do with your unique strengths.


I’m sure you’ve heard the question, “Is the glass half empty or half full?” One answer could be that it is half empty. A second answer could be that it is half full. A third answer, and my personal favorite, is that it is completely full because it is half water and half air. Your perspective is everything. You can become what you want to become if you believe in yourself and are willing to work hard.  This article will help you


While growing up, a young man was shy.  He refused to go to his neighbor’s house without his younger brother Mike.  At the age of 10, although he had played baseball for years, he refused to swing the bat due to fear.  This kid wouldn’t even swing the bat once!!!!  As he grew older, his confidence grew slowly until his siblings passed him in height. His 12 year old brother Mike and 10 year old sister Tiffany were both taller than this 14 year old kid, and that really hurt his confidence.  Finally, high school came and his confidence grew in different areas.  His local church leader begged this young man from the age of 15 to the age of 17 to speak at church.  The church leader even showed up at this young man’s house to personally plead with him to speak at church.  It was taboo to refuse to speak, especially when your church leader shows up at your house.  Even though this young man’s confidence had grown in so many different areas. He still said no.

If you haven’t guessed it yet, this young man is me.  I was the shyest kid around.  I was quiet and reserved.  I am still that way.  I am not a different person, just a better version of me.  For most people, networking is a learned behavior.  The myth that you are either a born networker or not is truly a load of crap.

When I started network marketing in 2008, I had by that time become a great networker, but I was an awful presenter. Each industry requires different skills. In network marketing I felt I needed to become at least a decent presenter.  I was great at getting people to come look at the products or opportunity, but I was so soft spoken that I couldn’t present anything in front of a group of people very well.  Understanding that, I knew I had to practice to become great at presenting.  Just as networking was a learned skill, I knew that presenting would be one as well.


E.M Grey spent much of his life studying what makes one successful.  In his essay The Common Denominator of Success, he sums up what the secret of success is.

“The secret of success of every man who has ever been successful — lies in the fact that he formed the habit of doing things that failures don’t like to do.”

As uncomfortable as it was, I requested to speak at every meeting, even if it was just for a few minutes.  Each time, I would ask everyone I could where I could improve.  It wasn’t comfortable.  I didn’t love doing it.  It went against my nature, but I knew that if I wanted to have success, I had to leave my comfort zone.


One of the most profound insights I have learned from studying all of the greats is that each one of them possess the ability to learn how to learn.  I don’t know if there is any greater ability.  No one person is naturally the best at anything without deliberate practice.  In order to become great at anything, it takes time, and usually lots of it.

With that time comes learning.  All of the greats, like Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Leonardo Da Vinci, and Elon Musk, have this uncanny ability to learn.  Knowing this gives me hope that where I am weak, I can become strong.  You can become great at anything that doesn’t require a physical skill. I leave physical out it because I can’t give someone more height and certain people will never be able to jump out of a gym like Michael Jordan did.  Of course, everyone can improve their physical abilities and push the limits of their own bodies, but anyone can be great at anything that doesn’t require physical ability.  All you need is the ability to learn, and then deliberate practice.

Your weaknesses can become strengths
Greatness is learned
The ability to learn is a MUST
Be willing to do whatever it takes even when it is uncomfortable

My last 3 articles




I asked 15 different Network Marketing leaders this question:  What are the top ten most helpful books for someone in Network Marketing?  

The last few years I have read 100’s and 100’s of books.  My first 18 months in Network Marketing (2008) I read 100 books.  I was going to write an article on my personal favorite books but I thought it would be better to mix in my favorite books along with 15 industry leaders opinions.  I have STUDIED all of the books listed below.

ENJOY and please add any books that are in your favorites but weren’t mentioned

The Classics

The Greatest Salesmen In The World by Og Mandino

This book is more about how to empower yourself. It teaches you how to motivate yourself.  If you like parable story version books you will love this book.  Don’t let the title mislead you though.  This book won’t give you much on technique for selling.

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

The all-time classic on understanding and communicating with others.  When you read this book it is so common sense.   Then you wonder why don’t I do everything that is taught in this book?  This is one of those books that you need to study over and over.

Think and Grow Rich by Napolean Hill

Think and Grow Rich is the number one inspirational classic and gets more credit than any other for personal development. Napolean Hill spent over 20 years researching the accomplishments and attributes of 500 of the most successful people in business.  Think and Grow Rich is a classic that all should read.

The Magic of Thinking Big by David J. Schwartz

This is a perfect book on mindset.  The author gives countless examples on the power of thinking big.  

7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey

I maybe biased because I grew up by Stephen Covey and hung out at his house several times.  He goes in depth on how your character is based on the habits your form.  Habits consist of knowledge, skill and desire.  Covey gives you an in depth blueprint on how to become a better person.  He does so in such an insightful articulate way.

As a Man Thinketh by James Allen

This is one of the shortest and easiest reads there is.  Don’t be fooled though.  It is the most profound book on this entire list.  You could spend hours pondering so many of the statements in this book.  This is a must read.  


Laws of Success by Napoleon Hill

The Laws of Success is organized into sixteen original principles.  This is a much more in depth version of Think and Grow Rich

The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership by John Maxwell

This is my favorite book on the topic of leadership.  If you want to be a top leader this is a must read book

5 Levels of Leadership by John Maxwell

John Maxwell explores the 5 levels of leadership – their upsides, downsides, the best behaviors for that level, the beliefs that help a leader move up to the next level, and how the level relates to the Laws of Leadership.

Vision – Belief – Perspective

Put Your Dream to The Test by John Maxwell

This isn’t a very well known book but it applies majorly to entrepreneurs and network marketers.  It gives a great perspective on what it really takes to pursue a dream.

Give and Take by Adam Grant

One of my recent favorite books.  It breaks the myth that takers are the one’s who win.  It gives real examples with statistics to back up ambitious givers.  It throws out some surprising professions where you would think that it wouldn’t matter if you are a giver or taker.

4 Hour Workweek by Timothy Ferriss

It took me years to get around to reading this book.  I thought I knew the concept already just from being in Network Marketing.  Once I started it I couldn’t put it down.

Start With Why by Simon Sinek

Almost all Network Marketers have heard the power of having a why.  This book gives incredible examples of both athletes and businesses, that have both failed and succeeded based on their why.

The Entrepreneur Roller Coaster by Darren Hardy

Darren Hardy gives incredible insight on what it takes to be an entrepreneur.  I love the perspective he gives on how entrepreneurs hate what they do 95% of the time but that’s the importance of having a why that you love.

Business of the 21st Century  by Kim Kiyosaki and Robert Kiyosaki

This book gives Network Marketing so much credibility.  You have some of the most well known names in finance who have never been apart of Network Marketing yet edifying it.  The Kiyosaki’s tell you why Network Marketing is thee business of the 21st century.

Beach Money by Jordan Adler

Jordan is great down earth guy who gives his story of struggles and successes in Network Marketing.  This book will give you massive vision on your Network Marketing business.

The Greatest Networker in the World by John Milton Fogg

You will find some of the most profound Network Marketing statements in this book.  You will want to reread this book

Building an Organization

Six Figures in Six Months by Clay Stevens

This book will teach you the fundamentals for building a Network Marketing business.  It is considered by most to be a top 5 must read book

Building an Empire by Brian Carruthers

Brian is not only successful but he lives what he teaches.  He understands the trenches of building your business and explains that in depth in this book.

Building Your Network Marketing Business by Jim Rohn

Jim Rohn in my mind has the most powerful one liners.  I love how he communicates the vision of building your Network Marketing business.  After reading this book you will feel bulletproof.

Go Pro by Eric Worre

This book is widely considered as the best Network Marketing book for beginners.  It is very basic yet very insightful.  An easy great read that all beginners should read right away and all experts should go through every year.  

Your First Year in Network Marketing by Mark Yarnell

The title says it all.  This book gives both the rookie and even the expert perspective on what it takes to succeed in Network Marketing.  This book will help you treat Network Marketing like a real business.

The Four Year Career by Richard Bliss Brooke

This book covers it all.  The author gives statistics on the economy.  He sheds perspective on the what financial security really is.  You will learn about some of the myths and realities of Network Marketing.  You will also learn more about the industry as well some incredible third-party endorsements and tips from those experts.


The 5 Love Languages Dr Chapman

This book isn’t just to help you with a spouse or girlfriend/boyfriend.  It is helpful in understanding how to communicate with anyone.  This is one of those life changing books that you will read and then share with everyone.

Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi

One of the few books that focuses on networking in general.  You will pick up a ton of tips to implement on how to better network


The Compound Effect Darren Hardy

Darren Hardy’s style is one of my favorites.  He has no fluff in his book and gets straight to the point.  In this book he gives you incredible perspective on how little things can make a huge difference.  It sounds like common sense but after reading the book it definitely helped me to have much more discipline.

Take the Stairs by Rory Vaden

Rory gives perspective on not taking shortcuts.  Why the harder route usually ends up the easier and better route.  I loved the author’s perspective and attitude.

Go For No by Andrea Waltz and Richard Fenton

After reading this book you will never look at rejection the same.  You will embrace it with a new perspective.  If you struggle with rejection this book will be a gold mine for you.

The 10x Rule by Grant Cardone

Grant Cardone nails it in this book.  He is bold and brash with new ideas.  If you want to be GREAT and not just GOOD then this is your book.  

The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson

Both The Compound Effect and The Slight Edge are similar books that shed light on the power of the daily disciplines.  I loved the way Jeff communicated the value in doing everything just a little bit better

Who Wants to be That Crazy Network Marketer and Annoy Everyone?!?

How do you have posture; showing enough confidence but not arrogance???  Showing true confidence by being yourself and not fake??  Stating your intentions in a direct way without throwing up on the prospect with too much info??  Creating urgency without chasing??  Balance balance balance.  We listen to calls, go to meetings and even read books to fine tune our skill set.  To pick up little insights that will give us more vision and enable us to pass that vision onto others.
Most people think that either they have to annoy all their friends and family to succeed in Network Marketing or they won’t succeed.  You don’t have to be in the NFL to succeed. For those of that think the NFL is the National Football League it isn’t. In our industry the NFL would be the No Friends League.
I believe that there is a way to respectfully approach all of your family and friends so that you don’t become that annoying MLMer.
I heard a leader say this once, “all I talk about is (she named her mlm company).  All my friends are only from my mlm company because my other friends know that I am going to keep dripping on them about my company until they do it.”
Really??!!! Now wonder so many people don’t even want to talk to us!! Be a real person. Amateurs convince experts sort. Your job is to get your prospects to take a close look.  Your goal is to make sure that they at least KNOW what you are doing to make some sort of an educated decision. Then whatever decision they make is their choice.
Moving on to the topic of posturing, let me give a personal example. I just ran into a friend randomly.  This friend was approached about several years ago by someone in my organization.  His first question was, “are you still doing that MLM thing??”  I said yes.  It isn’t a job.  It is my lifestyle.  This guys name is John.  John said, “really?” I could never do that kind of thing.  I quickly told him it isn’t for everyone.  Only the willing.   I know how to teach you and anyone for that matter to do Network Marketing as a business.  I also can teach you a way to do it where you won’t lose any friends or family.  Most companies don’t know how to do that.  By the end of the 3 min conversation John said to me that he was leaving to go do sales for the summer but that when he got back he wants to explore doing Network Marketing as his future because residual income is what he has been looking for.
Now I don’t know if he will really sign up.  The point is this.  All of you have the tools to do this business and can say what I said in your own words.  You don’t have to have had massive success to say what I said.  I walked and talked just like I do now after a few days in the business.  Of course you learn more as you go but I kept it simple, passionate and confident.  If you don’t have confidence in yourself then don’t make yourself the issue.  Find something that you do have confidence in like the company and the leadership.  The next important part of that story is this…..  You can’t take away something you haven’t given them. I hear this all the time.  I just took the business away from them because they didn’t seem interested.  Of course there comes a point where that is the best strategy but all too often we take something away from prospects that don’t even know what it is we have to offer.  So posturing isn’t acting so cool that you act like you don’t care about them.  It is a balance.  Have your prospect get on a launch call (which is an introduction to the business), go to a meeting or get on a 3 way call.  Be careful to not sift too early and make sure that as you sift through prospects that YOU GET REFERRALS. In the story about John I was short in conversation, confident, let him know he could do this business.  I let him know I would love to work with him but I didn’t sound desperate.  I didn’t come off as arrogant like I make so much money that he didn’t matter.  What I did is I postured with an attitude that Network Marketing works and it will work for him if he is willing!
The next piece of advice that I have is this…
Call all your friends that said NO. Ask how they are doing without mentioning Network Marketing. When someone says no to you give them a follow up call just to be a real person and let them know there are no hard feelings by your actions.  People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.  BUILD THE RELATIONSHIP WITH PEOPLE is not an easy topic.  Some interpret that as, I have to talk with my prospects X amount times before I can mention my business.  Others don’t care and go the other extreme only interested in taking one’s money and their intentions are clear which will turn the prospect off.
Like I said, the balance on this topic isn’t an easy thing to do.  There is no set way.  There is no systematic way with people.  Every person is different and every relationship is different.
Always clearly state your intentions
That isn’t easy.  From your standpoint you want to make money off this individual but you also want to help them make money.  Neither is wrong and both are important.  I always let my prospect know why this is the best business plan on the planet.  In this business we make more money if our prospects make more money so we are incentivized to work as teams. The greatest part is your organization has the opportunity to make more money then you do!!!  If that doesn’t make sense to you then please talk to one of your leaders.  It is called geometric growth.  Each distributor who comes in has the opportunity to make more money then the person who sponsored them and in fact they have the opportunity to make more money then every single person in their upline.
The next bit of advice is FACEBOOK.  As always, don’t take just take my advice.  Each leadership team will have a little different perspective.  Whatever they tell you is RIGHT.
I have never heard anyone who has had massive success from postings on Facebook.  Status updates like, do you want easy money, call me if you want to make money and business is so good are so cliche and overused they make people want to run the other way. They don’t help you sponsor the leaders; which is who we are all looking for. If you know of someone that has had success through postings on Facebook it is a lucky exception and WILL not duplicate properly.   Remember what works in our business is what duplicates.  Sure many of the leaders in your company may post stuff about their business but they are plugging their whole organization into the most recent news.  Most of their friends on Facebook are probably from their business.  They also have formed credibility so what they say doesn’t sound as cliche.
Just imagine a scenario with me.  The common person gets on Facebook.  Every week they see their friend post something new about your business.  The more they see the more MOST of them will think, “wow I don’t want to be that annoying person.  I could never do that.”
For some of you it isn’t bad to post something every once in a while but constant bombarding will not attract leaders nor will it attract those who aren’t in our industry.  I separate my contacts on Facebook.  I scroll over each new friend and if I want them receiving my Network Marketing updates then I  list them as business.  If they are just friends then I don’t need to change anything.  This way when I post something that is strictly for my business contacts I am able post solely for them.  If you aren’t sure how to do that just google it and you will learn quickly.  Using this technique I am able to be much more efficient and can properly utilize social media.  
Facebook does have great value.  Use it to build relationships.  Use it to promote lifestyle but don’t use it to spam your friends (your non network marketing friends).  They already think you are crazy!  🙂
Many of you will disagree with me and that’s ok.  Do whatever your leadership team tells you to do.
“Wherever you are be there.” Let me preface this; when hanging out with friends if they ask me about work, “I say this is the funnest  that I have ever done.  It is work just like everything but I love it.  Then say I really don’t talk a lot about work when I am with friends or family.” I change the subject and ask how they are doing. Now understand this is more of a group setting in a bigger function with friends or family.  Also understand that I will call them later to talk about my business. Yes there are circumstances where you probably have someone that is really interested.  In that circumstance keep it short and confident.  If they seem interested then talk about the business but don’t throw up on them. Don’t be DESPERATE!
A couple last little bits of advice
Put all Birthday’s in your phone and text Happy Birthday.  Not just your contacts from your business but all contacts.  If you are on your Facebook account it will say when your friends birthday is.  If you don’t have their birthday in your calendar you should text people asking them when their birthday is because you are updating your calendar and contact information.  Just a simple Happy Birthday goes a long way.  People love to have other people actually care about them.  You will find it becomes fun to see the responses you get back and is great to just stay on contact with people.  Yes that’s even if they never do the business!
Send out a minimum of 3 emails every week to reconnect with friends.  I would send out more and I would do it on red time (meaning do it when it is a non prospecting time like late night or early morning).
Be social. Truly love people and talk to people everywhere.  Do it for the right reasons.  Even if someone isn’t interested in the business I have learned to always love talking and conversing with people.
I learned a valuable lesson from my mentor Lon Wardrop.  I remember coming home from Lake Powell with him in September of 2009.  We got a flat tire on the way home.  There was a gentlemen who was 80 years old who pulled in to see if we needed help.  Lon spoke with this individual for 25 minutes.  Lon never asked this man for his phone number.  He didn’t have any intentions with the business.  Lon just loves talking with people.
I don’t want anyone to take this article and misinterpret it. I was speaking to you directly on the way we handle and approach with those we know. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be making contacts with people you don’t know that you come in contact with. We should always be listening and engaging in conversation with those we meet in random places whether that’s at a restaurant, getting your oil changed or wherever that may be.  We are in the business of becoming professional friend makers.
We should ALWAYS be taking massive action.
Don’t think you need to know everything I just taught you.  Don’t be overwhelmed. Your Network Marketing company is a lifestyle.  Walt Disney says, “the best way to get started is to start doing.”  Don’t be afraid to make mistakes.  My point is that you can be a real person and make this business happen.  In fact MOST of the leaders are all Real People and not crazy MLMers.  This business is about leadership.  My goal is to empower you to become better leaders.  Stephen Covey says, “that leadership is communicating someones worth and potential so clearly that they see it in themselves.”  It doesn’t matter where you are at in your Network Marketing business.  What matters is where you are going!  Start seeing yourself for what and who you can be because all of us can be more.  We are here on this earth to be great.  So let’s go make it happen!

DREAMS by Rob Sperry

The importance of them.  The adversity and challenges they bring. I will give insight on how others achieved their dreams which will relate to us on how we can achieve our dreams and goals.
Before we really get started the question you should ask yourself is, What are you willing to sacrifice or endure in order to live your dream life??  The fact is, no matter how easily your purpose or your “why” in the business comes to you, you will have to make sacrifices in order to achieve it.

It seems that sometime in our early 20’s our dreams begin to leave.  We begin to settle for less and stop pursuing our dreams.  It seems that sometime in our early 20’s we begin to accept the fact that we may not reach those lofty goals we once had.  By the time we reach our mid 30’s it seems that most people have almost totally lost their dreams and by  age 50 people completely stop dreaming.  You see when we are young we typically know how to dream but we don’t know how to work.  As we get older we know how to work but we forget how to dream.

In Network Marketing there is what’s called the Honeymoon stage and then the Sophomore blues.
When you start out in this business you are on what’s called the honeymoon.  You have all these great expectations and all of these big goals.  You are so excited.  For many that dream leaves real quick with the first no and for others it takes a few months.  Anyone who has been married knows that when you get married you have all these BIG dreams.  You think you are different and will be the one’s that make it through your marriage.  You also believe you will have less problems than other couples.  You go on your honeymoon and even after the honeymoon you feel like you are on a high.  Whether it is a week, a month or a year eventually you realize that no matter how great your spouse is and no matter how much you love your spouse, marriage is work.  Our business is the same way. Most of us are strong starters but few of us are strong finishers. We get excited about the possibilities of what this business can do for us but soon we find out that we actually have to work.  That this business is NetWORK marketing.  Not NetHOPING or NetWISHING.  You see this business is tough but what business isn’t?  The difference is, in this financial vehicle the journey is well worth the sacrifice.  In the beginning, stages of my business I had to remind myself of that constantly.  If you come to my house you will see a 6 by 4 foot dream board.  I have pictures of several of my family’s dreams.  We have things such as a houseboat in Lake Powell which represent time with friends and family.  Places we want to visit and things we want to do.  We want to do more for helping great causes so we have a picture of that up on the dream board.  My 5-year-old Cade always points out to visitors with full confidence that everything on the dream board are things we will have or places we will visit.  Surround yourself with your future.  Surround yourself with pictures of what this business will bring you.  There is great power in the subconscious mind and pictures help to forward that progress.

Going back to the topic of DREAMS in this business I want to point out another insight. No one realistic has ever accomplished anything great!! Think about that.  Michael Jordan wasn’t realistic when he sought out to be the best basketball player ever.   Man landing on the moon didn’t seem realistic once upon a time.  Even inventions like the TV or internet weren’t realistic.  Someone had to dream.  Someone had to be unrealistic and stretch their minds.
Let’s look at an example
When I started the business my menor pushed my buttons in a good way.  He told me to go for a particular level in the company where on average they make 16 k a year.  Then as I quickly approached that level he told me to go for the next level.  Considering I had no Network Marketing experience and was just working my Network Marketing business part-time that was totally unrealistic.  My first month part-time I had 39 bonus points in the pool (each new person signed up over a certain amount of volume constitutes a bonus point) working the business part-time.  Had someone told me to go for just a lower level in the company(the first leadership position in the company) that’s probably all I would have done.  Thinking and dreaming big is a skill and an art.  Don’t cripple your new people or your organization.  Just because you haven’t accomplished something great doesn’t mean others can’t or won’t.
Here is the key.  These individuals that all think big have also had some down moments in their lives or business.  The difference is when they do have those moments they buck up and go back at it harder.  90% of disappointment comes from unrealistic expectations. So you have to prepare yourself by almost being unreasonably optimistic.  You set a high goal and if you don’t obtain that goal, you don’t make your goals smaller.  You just go back; Work harder and figure out how to be better.  You must be an optimist.  Looking for the best in everyone and every situation.  Now most of us are in this business part-time.  Most of us are looking to make a little extra money and maybe the big examples  don’t relate to you.   They should because you can use the same principles at whatever level you want.  Whether that’s going slow in the business or fast.  You can have the right attitude which will increase your effectiveness.

Here are a couple of insights from John Maxwell’s book “Put Your Dreams To The Test”
The dream is free but the journey isn’t.
At some point you need to make the transition from believer of the dream to buyer of the dream. No dream comes true without someone paying for it.
Dream believers are in abundance and dream buyers are rare.
The moment you declare your dream and try to move toward it, problems begin to surface.  Facing the reality is like having cold water hit you in the face. Not expecting anything like that, many people become discouraged. Some table their dreams, putting them on hold. Others abandon their dreams.

My insight is your “why” has to be big enough and clear enough to fight for your dreams.

Here is some more insight and pay close attention
The price will be higher than you expect.
Never once have I heard the words'” getting to the top was much easier than I anticipated.  Now think about that insight…..  However hard you thought Network Marketing would be it will be harder than that. That should not discourage you because that’s not Network Marketing that is anything great that has ever been accomplished.

Here are a few things you will find
The journey will take longer than you hoped.
The obstacles will be more numerous than you believed.
The disappointments will be greater than you expected.
The lows will be lower than you imagined.
The price will be higher than you anticipated.
John Maxwell

John Maxwell’s list
You must pay the price of these 3 things in order to succeed.
1. PAY THE Price of dealing with criticism from people who matter
2. Pay the price of overcoming your fears
3. Pay the price of hard work
Here are some examples from books that I have read dealing with number 1 which is handling criticism from people who matter
Winston Churchill was a young man, his father concluded that Winston
was “unfit for a career in law or politics” because he did so badly in
Barbra Streisand‘s mother told her she wasn’t pretty enough to be an
actress because her voice wasn’t good enough.
Conrad Hilton, who created a business empire with his Hilton hotels,
once overheard his father say to his mother,”Mary, I do not know what
will become of Connie. I’m afraid he’ll never amount to anything”
When Charles Darwin was getting ready to set sail on his 5 year
expedition on the beagle, his father was extremely disappointed. He
thought his son was drifting into a life of sin and idleness.
George Washington‘s mother was a harping, complaining self-centered
women by all accounts. She belittled Washington’s accomplishments and
didn’t show up at either of his presidential inaugurations. She was
always whining that her children neglected her.
— People will criticize you and make fun of your ideas or
actively try to stop you.  Sometimes their goal is to only protect you.  But as we have all learned failure is only a possibility if you stop. If you keep going, a ” failure” is just another learning experience. I look at this way giving up a dream is worse than failing.
So be kind and listen to the criticisms of those you care about but then go live your dreams!  It is your life.  You and only you are responsible for your life.  No one else.
The most important thing is to keep your dreams alive by not just thinking about them but acting upon them.  By moving closer to them each and every single day.  It doesn’t matter how small the steps of progress are, only that you are moving in the right direction.

We all know that the world is FULL of dream crushers.  Think about it.  We all compare.  Some of us do it more than others.  If you are successful than it makes most or many close to you feel unsuccessful.

Les Brown says, “Most of us don’t even go for our dreams because we don’t feel like we deserve it.”

That’s why it is so crucial that you work harder on yourself than you do on your job.  You must become the person to feel that you deserve and expect the success.

Always remember that you don’t need anyone to approve your dream.  Take full responsibility of your life.  Take full responsibility of your dreams.  Don’t make excuses.  Make reasons to fulfill those dreams.  There is a great quote that says, “Avoidance of risk is the greatest risk of all.”

“Always remember there are only two kinds of people in this world — the realists and the dreamers. The realists know where they are going.  The dreamers have already been there.”

Robert Orben.

Victims, Survivors, and Conquerors of the World by Rob Sperry

What are you investing in?  We are all investors and fall into 3 groups of people.  We all create our own life’s by the mental picture we perceive.
What do you envision yourself as?  If you were to write down who you are, what type of person you are and your perception of what you can or can’t do what would it be?
Do you envision yourself as always having bad luck and you aren’t meant for success?  Or do you envision yourself as someone who has to struggle for a certain period of time before you succeed?  Do you envision yourself making insane amounts of money right out of the gate?  I have met a lot of people who claim they envision massive success but how many truly envision it so clearly that they make it happen? Let’s talk about the 3 different types of people in detail.  Victims, Survivor’s and Conqueror’s.
As I write on these 3 subjects I want all of you to be honest with yourself and where you think you fall in these 3 categories.
VICTIMS – Victim’s are those who always COMPLAIN and WHINE.  They always seem to think they are unlucky and that everyone else get’s all the breaks.  Victim’s rarely take responsibility.  They blame others for their problems.  They project their problems…. Meaning if money is an issue they make it someone else’s issue as well.  If time is an issue for them they make that issue everyone else’s and so on and so on.  Victims always seem to find their issues in everyone else.  I personally never have the issue of, I don’t have any money.  I believe that’s because the money was never an issue for me.
Victim’s blame everything they can on someone or something else.  They blame their upline for not enough support.  They blame the product for not working as well as they thought it would.  They find every excuse known to man and they use them frequently.  They get so good at giving the excuses and buy into their own philosophy that they become more and more of a victim.  Ralph waldo emerson said, “shallow men believe in luck…. strong men believe in cause and effect.”
If you are a victim of life don’t worry there is hope….  Of course you must first be honest with yourself and identify who you are.  In order to fix the problem you have to admit there is a problem.
SURVIVORS – Are widely known to most as a good thing.  I would classify survivors as a notch above victims but for the most part I would call survivors: STRUGGLERS.  Why would I do that?  Well let me explain.  Survivors won’t quit but don’t yet expect success.  They don’t feel like they deserve success yet.  They hope for it and believe that someday it will happen.  That someday something will click or will change in their business or in life.  They don’t take total initiative but they are persistent.  They are more persistent in their minds then their actions.  By that I mean they come to meeting, listen to the calls but they avoid the core of the business which is consistently recruiting and talking to new people.
Survivors have the least amount of disciplined persistence necessary to survive and keep going.  They still have tons of fear.CONQUERORS – This is the top of the food chain. Many in this category were at one time survivors and even possibly victims but they progressed. Conquerors have the abundance mentality.  They expect and deserve success.  Their mind set is at a whole different level.  Fear doesn’t rule their universe.  If they have fear they take action immediately and their fear leaves.  Conquerors know that 80 percent of learning comes from outside the classroom.  We learn by doing!!!  85% of millionaires don’t have their college degree.  It is cause Conquerors don’t make excuses.  They dig deep and make it happen.  No one who is normal ever makes history.  Don’t be normal.  If you want to be normal than you want to be in over 10 k credit card debt, working 9 to 5, making 30,000 a year with no retirement.  If you want to be normal you will do what the average american does which is watch over 6 hours of TV a day.  Conquerors aren’t normal.
Conquerors are the opposite of victims.  The glass is half full.  They seek out support from their upline but if they don’t get it, they take initiative and figure out a way to make it happen.  They think they are lucky always being at the right place at the right time.  They understand luck favors the persistent.
There is a great quote in Chineese proverb: “The best time to plant a tree is 2 years ago.  The 2nd best time is today.”  I think that quote relates well with our topic.  Sure maybe you haven’t done what you could have or should have accomplished.  Start today.  Find the courage and inner strength to believe in your potential.
God did not put anyone on this earth to fail.  We all have ability and we all have talent to succeed.  If you don’t believe it then you are lying to yourself!  This business is a lot of fun.  It is fun overcoming fears and building confidence.  It is fun helping others progress.  It is fun making money and it is even more fun helping others make a lot of money.
Please if you remember anything at all just remember you can really do this.  You can really do this.  Become the conqueror of your life!

Keys to success:
1. Don’t ever quit based on discouragement or an irrational emotion (survivor)
2. Take initiative and become the conqueror

These principles apply in life.  Obviously in life there are things that you should quit and need to move on to.  The key in quitting is not to base a decision of an irrational emotion.  Pre-determine when you will quit.  Make decisions on quitting from a conquerors perspective.  Here is another great quote, “People think that is holding on that makes you stronger; but sometimes it is letting go.”

Lastly I want to point out that each one of us has some victim, survivor and conqueror in us.  I know Fathers who are great Fathers but lousy at business.  I know athletes who are conquerors in their sport but are victim’s in other aspects of their lives.  The goal is to become better in all aspects of life but especially the one’s that you deem valuable.